Happy New Year! Hope you’ve all recovered from the typical holiday food, family and drink overload. My kids were ungrateful as usual and I almost burned the turkey. Other than that, Christmas and New Years came and went without too much drama.

Now, let’s get down to business. I’ve got 11 topics below. Respond to what moves you, ignore what doesn’t or if you’re so inclined, you can talk about whatever grooves you.

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1. SACRILEGE … AGAIN!

On Wednesday, January 11, 2006 under a post titled “Sacrilege,” I published this shocking photo of the living god celebrity Clive Owen on my now defunct blog. I wrote: “OMG! OMG! Clive? CLIVE!!!! What in Hades have you done to yourself? OMG! I’m permanently scarred!!!! This man is an imposter!”

To say I was traumatized would be an understatement since I worship the ground … er … um … I’m a huge Clive Owen fan. What made me remember this horrific incident? Well, after finding the following shocking photos yesterday of Gerard Butler, the other male celebrity I stalk on the internet I admire, memories of my Clive Owen trauma resurfaced.

Introducing the NEW Gerard Butler……

(Click to enlarge) Get me the smelling salts!!!!  Gasp!  Sigh! Oh, NOOOOOOO!!!!  Whimper….

Okay, I’m over it. Nobody stays ripped forever I guess. Heck, I’d still jump Gerry’s bones. Don’t tell my DH though.
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2. FROM THE AGENT’S DESK

Agent Janet Reid has given us a glimpse into what she did last year. One-hundred-and-twenty-four manuscripts later, she’s put together some interesting stats. Here’s a snippet from her post titled: “Statistics to torture yourself with in 2009“:

—Just plain not good enough: 21 (a novel needs to be in the 99th percentile-these were closer to 90%–not bad, but not good enough)

—Good premise, but the rest of the novel didn’t hold up: 11

—Not compelling or vivid, or focused; no plot/tension: 10

—Slow start or the pace was too slow: 9

—I didn’t believe the narrative voice: 5

—Structural problems with the novel: 8

—Interesting premise, but not a fresh or new take on familiar plots/tropes: 7

—Had caricatures rather than characters: 2

—Boring: 3

—Grossed me out: 2

—Major plot problems: 2

—Needed more polish and editorial input than I wanted to do: 2

—Good books but I couldn’t figure out where to sell them: 7

Read the rest HERE. In a similar vein, Agent Kristin Nelson has posted her 2009 stats on her blog.

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3. THE INEVITABLE QUESTION

Did you make any writerly New Years resolutions?

Me? Just one. FINISH THE DANG BLASTED BOOK! I usually don’t do resolutions, but this is a must.

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4. A TASTY DISH OF CROW

According to Information Week, “Amazon sold more electronic books than physical books on Christmas Day, due to the popularity of the Kindle e-reader, the online retailer reported. It was the first time e-books had led in sales. In addition, the Kindle has become the most gifted item ever on Amazon, according to the company, which did not release sales numbers. Amazon’s peak sales day this year was Dec. 14, when customers ordered a record 9.5 million items worldwide, or 110 items per second. The news impressed investors who pushed Amazon stock up nearly 2% to $141 on Monday.”

They can credit Kindle all they want but the fact remains that these are still e-books. Period. Slowly but surely the industry and consumers are adapting to this new technology.

Pssst!  Hey, RWA….  Still think e-publishing is a bad business model? hahahaha

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5. THE BEST/WORST

Movies:

Best: Star Trek; Worst: Two-way tie between Borat and The Final Destination

Worst Disappointment/Best Surprise on film:

Worst: Two way tie between (a) Paranormal Activity — While it didn’t stink it was VERY over-hyped. (b) Watchmen — It just didn’t deliver for me. As an aside, I still can’t figure out why Billy Crudup’s blue man walked around with his junk hanging out all the time. Best: Star Trek — I totally thought it was going to be a bomb. Man, was I wrong!

New Food I tried:

Best: Lumpia; Worst: Escargot

Books:

Best: The Girl She Used To Be; Worst: Okay, I’ll say “Most disappointing read“: Pride and Prejudice –I absolutely LOVED Mr. Darcy. Can’t say the same for Elizabeth. :-(

New To Me TV Series:

Best: Three-way tie between House, Lie To Me and The Mentalist; Worst: Two-way tie between–Jon & Kate Plus Eight and American Idol

Scandals:

Best: Five-way tie between (a) Photogate–East Cleveland Mayor Eric Brewer’s tranny pictures, (b) Sarah Palingate (Quitting governorship, War w/Letterman, Going Rogue memoir’s alleged exaggerations and untruths… etc … (c) Adulterygate — Tiger Woods and his MANY women (d) Harlequin/Vanity Pressgate, (f) Babygate — John Edwards’ alleged lovechild; Worst: Two-way tie between (a) Mackenzie Phillips/Papa John incest yuck and (b) Chris Brown/Rihanna domestic violence

Shows I Stopped Watching For One Reason Or Another:

Best: Mad Men, Ghost Hunters, Dating In The Dark; Worst: Wildfire, American Idol

Celebrity deaths:

Most Shocking: Michael Jackson, hands down.  Came completely out of the blue.

Least shocking: Ted Kennedy — We all knew he was battling brain cancer for a while.

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6. SO IT’S COME TO THIS????

(Click to enlarge)

Here’s what terrorist Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab wore in his failed attempt to take down a commercial airplane during Christmas. If a man is willing to hide explosives beneath his family jewels all bets are off. What’s next? A stick of dynamite up his bum? Don’t laugh. It’s entirely plausible. How on earth will Homeland Security detect that??? Now where do we go from here? Full cavity searches?

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7. LOOKING AHEAD

I’M LOOKING FORWARD TO READING: The Secret Year by Jennifer R. Hubbard, These Three Remain by Pamela Aidan and In Bed With The Devil by Lorraine Heath

I WANT TO RE-WATCH:
Yentl — I *loved* this movie and I’m typically not into musicals, but the plot is so compelling (and heartbreaking) and the love story is so complicated/multifaceted, and the music is sooooo awesome that it remains on my must re-watch list every year.

I’M LOOKING FORWARD TO PLAYING: American McGee’s Alice 2 (can’t wait!!!)

I WANT TO EAT: Lot’s of salad and sea food

PREDICTIONS: Print newspapers will continue to go the way of the dodo. E-books will thrive.  Agents will be even MORE selective.  My arse will continue to spread because I will (like always) cheat on my diet.

I’M LOOKING FORWARD TO SEEING: Avatar, A Portrait of Dorian Gray, Sherlock Holmes, The Hurt Locker,  This Is It and The Wolfman.

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8. WANTED

Lit agent Kate Epstein is looking for YA submissions. Check her out HERE.

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9. BLAST FROM THE PAST

Oh, the horrors of being a teenager. This song and its lyrics are timelessly poignant. Ian was/is a genius.

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10. HOW WOULD YOUR WIP FARE?

Got this from a blogpost by Kathy Temean:

Top Ten Questions Dutton Editors Ask Themselves When Looking At A Manuscript

1. Who is the readership for this book?

2. Does this story surprise me and take me to places I didn’t expect?

3. Is this a main character I care about?

4. Am I personally moved by this story or [situation]?

5. I this a theme/emotion/concern that a lot of kids will be able to relate to?

6. Has this been done a million times before?

7. Will I want to read this manuscript ten (or more) times?

8. Is the voice/character authentic and real?

9. For picture books: Would this story be visually [interesting] for 32 pages? Could I [easily] envision the illustrations for this?

10. For novels: Does the action of the story move at a good pace and hold our interest? Does tension build as the story moves forward?

Can you think of any others, or do you have any thoughts on the ten she’s posted? BTW, she has an excellent excerpt from author David Harrison on how to generate original story ideas. It’s a keeper. Check it out HERE.

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11. FAIL! FAIL! FAIL!

Timeline Fail: (Click the picture to enlarge)  Be sure to read the note at the bottom. lol
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Evidence Fail (38 second video):

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Parenting Fail