I never used to used to listen to music while I wrote. I’ve always preferred quiet, but for whatever reason that’s changed. The play lists I used to create to listen to while I wasn’t writing have turned into soundtracks for my stories. Each song fits a specific scene, while some songs fit the whole theme.
The title of my September release is MY PREROGATIVE, which is also the title of a song by Bobby Brown, (redone years later by Britney Spears). The title alone should tell you a bit about this story. While the song isn’t exactly perfect for the book, the title fits, and the song was still on the play list…
I admit it, a lot of me is in Kelsey. I’ve been a bartender/waitress for 20 years, and I’ve traveled all over the world. The idea was to give those who’ve never worked a job like that a glimpse at how a persons outlook on life can be different. Your mind works a bit different when you live a world that is almost always dark, when you watch the sun rise before going to bed, and get up just before the sun sets.
The first song on the MY PREROGATIVE play list was Cuz I Can ~ Pink
I drink more than you, I party harder than you, and my cars faster than yours too. Hah!
When Cuz I Can first starts you can hear that line trash talk’n before the song even starts. It sets the mood, and I love it. I love Pink; I think she’s the epitome of a person who stays true to herself, especially in a business with so much pressure to conform. From her debut album MIZUNDERSTOOD, she’s remained true to who she is and that’s how I saw Kelsey, the heroine in MY PREROGATIVE.
Like most people Kelsey is multi-dimensional, so as the songs of the playlist are revealed, you’ll see that there are layers but to start with.. what Kelsey shows the world is her gypsy style happy love life side. Then we start to peel away the layers, and see more and more of what she thinks, how she feels, and who she is. Each one of these songs struck a chord with me while I was writing Kelsey’s story so check them out..
So I cash my checks and place my bets
and I hope I’ll always win.
But even if I don’t, I’m fucked because I live a life of Sin.
But it’s all right, I don’t give a damn.
I don’t play your rules, I make my own.
Tonight I’ll do what I want”
PINK also has an older song called MOST GIRLS, that I think is perfect for Kelsey, It’s all about wanting a man for love…not bling … or anything else.
Next up would be So Much To Say ~ Dave Mathews Band. This song has always sort of touched me. It’s not a new one, but it’s one that I think a lot of people “get”. Including Kelsey.
I find sometimes it’s easy to be myself. Sometimes I find it’s better to be somebody else
This is the quote at the front of the book, mostly because I think it’s something all of us can identify with. Dave Mathews Band is great, and this song speaks to me personally in many ways, and like any good author, bits of myself are in all of my characters.
I say my hell is the closet I’m stuck inside
Can’t see the light
And my Heaven is a nice house in the sky
Got central heating
and I’m alright
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Can’t see the light
Keep it locked up inside
Don’t talk about it
Talk about the weatherâ€.
Well, Kelsey talks about sex mostly…but this is the first verse of the song, and again, I think it can hit a lot of people close to home. How many times do we know we’re over thinking/ over analyzing something, driving ourselves nuts yet we do it? LOL
PAIN by 3 Days Grace is, again, a song that really hits home at certain moments for Kelsey. Kelsey drinks a lot, but then again, so do most bartenders I know. I know I certainly did when I worked in the nightclubs. You drink while you work to create a party, you drink after work because there’s not a lot else to do… and drinking is not something that encourages a person to look at the positive things in life.
“Pain …without love
….I can’t get enough
Pain… I like it rough
cuz I’d rather feel pain than nothing at all.”
Yes, MY PREROGATIVE the Britney Spears version was on the play list:
I don’t need no permission.
Make my own decisions
That’s my prerogative.
I Don’t Wanna Stop ~ Ozzy
All my life I’ve been over the top
I don’t know what I’m doing
All I know is I don’t wanna stop.
All fired up, I’m gonna go til I drop
You’re either in or in the way
Don’t make me, I don’t wanna stop
This song is about getting high, and while Kelsey drinks a lot, I associated the lyrics with her sexual appetite. The beat, strong, fast, and edgy suited the tempo of the story with My Prerogative, plus I love Ozzy.
You might wonder after watching these videos and hearing some of the lyrics if this is a depressing book, but really , it isn’t. I think Maria from Romance Novel TV sums it up best in her review when she says this:
I really liked Kelsey. She is uninhibited, a free spirit, and the title of the book absolutely fits her personality. On the surface, she’s a beautiful woman and the envy of many, but inside she doesn’t always feel that way. She has a hole inside that needs to be filled and is smart enough to admit that filling it with food, drink and casual sex isnâ€™t good, but still does it because it makes her feel better for a little while. She knows what she wants, but hasnâ€™t found it yet and is unwilling to settle. She wants someone who will see below the surface layer and be in love with her someone who wants more than to see her happy she wants someone who wants to make her happy. When she meets Harlan Shaw, she thinks she may have found that person, but is hesitant because she doesn’t quite know how to deal with those unfamiliar feelings.”
Reader K Hinton says in her Amazon.com review
“My Prerogative was erotic, intense, and entertaining. I read it whenever I got a few minutes free, and I actually liked it a lot more than I thought I would. Kelsey is sort of an anti-heroine. She isn’t sugar and spice and everything nice. Rather she’s pierced, fierce, and unapologeticIf you like erotic romance that’s not afraid to go outside the box, you’ll definitely enjoy My Prerogative.
I love the “pierced, fierce and unapologetic” …because that is definitely Kelsey. I knew when I was writing this story that not everyone would get it, but I also knew there were a lot of people out there who would. Many of us find that sometimes it’s easier to be someone else, even in our own minds, than it is to face our own weaknesses, strengths, and desires.
I hope you’ll check out MY PREROGATIVE, and that you enjoy following Kelsey on her journey. You can find an excerpt here, and of course, be sure to check out my other erotica books! Or you can purchase MY PREROGATIVE here.