February 19, 2007
Enchant Me
I was over at Bernitas reading her blog topic on Saturday about description and detail and I left a comment about a book I picked up while I was f*cking with the computer this weekend (but that’s another long bitch for a later day). The one thing I noticed in this book is that the writer uses lots of descriptors–big, hunky, hot, etc. To the point they’re annoying me and I’m only 45 pages in but I’m not sure I’ll finish the book. Stick with me…my other big complaint is that right after the first sex scene the hero says someting along the lines of, “I think I….” and the heroine tells him not to finish his statement–in other words he was going to say I think I’ve fallen for you.
Yes, a hero can fall for a heroine in the first 20 or so pages and yes descriptors are nice but the one thing I realized while over at Bernita’s is that this is why TELLING IS VERY BAD.
Now, as writers we know this. We know it’s important to show the reader instead of telling the reader. We see telling all the time and we know La Nora does it and gets away with it, hell I’ve even done it myself and it works great for segues from scene to scene.
It can be done (telling) and it can work but it CAN’T be done when all you’re trying to do is convince the reader that apples are orange and bananas are blue. Some readers will believe you, but some will be put off even if they don’t know why.
Don’t tell me how wonderful your characters’ date was, SHOW ME. Don’t tell me your heroine is scared, SHOW ME. Don’t tell me how big your hero’s equipment is, SHOW ME :D
If you want me to believe in the world/story you’ve created and that the sky is pink you have to SHOW ME. Draw me in, make me believe the world you’ve created, enchant me.



Soo… would saying “he had a big schlong” be telling?
Yeah. I thought so.
Her insides clenched in anticiption at the size er sight of his massive schlong.
how’s that?
:lmao::lmao::lmao:
I can totally agree with that. And you touched on one of my pet peeves. The word hunky. If an author describes a guy as hunky, they’ve just told me how old they are. Hunky is what my mom says.
hehehe I guess my point was I never realized what a big deal TELLING was until I started reading that book.